What Is Wrong with Me?

Life is a complicated journey, and there will be times when people feel lost. When loneliness, anxiety, jealousy or sadness occurs, some people may have negative feelings about themselves. They may even ask themselves, “What is wrong with me?” as they try to cope with their own difficulties in life. However, what they may not know is that these feelings of inadequacy are normal, and can be easily managed when they are recognized and regulated.

What's Wrong with You? – Your EQ May Be to Blame

Your emotional intelligence (EQ) is the level of your ability to recognize your own emotions and their effects, the sureness about your own self-worth and capabilities, and the ability to access and generate emotions. Simply put, people need to learn to recognize and label feelings and needs, and reconcile them with long-term goals and with the feelings and needs of other people involved. Take the test here to find out if your EQ is to blame for the misery you suffer from. Low scores on emotional intelligence tests means that you cannot understand or appreciate others' subtle messages. Some of the reasons why a low EQ can make your life miserable include:

1. Get Easily Irritated

People who are easily irritated are generally avoided by other people. If you get irritated by every word that a co-worker, a close friend, or your spouse says, and if your mood changes when people politely disagree with you, eventually, nobody wants to be around you. In this case, low EQ could cause you to feel lonely.

2. Always Feel Sad

Although normal, negative emotions can cause you to be sad and miserable. Usually the feelings are temporary. However, people with low EQ feel them constantly, and the negative emotions make them dislike themselves and others, while taking away any confidence they may have had.

3. Perform Poorly at Work

People who have this issue also have trouble mentally focusing on the task at hand. Most people who perform well and advance at work have a high EQ. With low EQ, you may not fully understand your boss's assignment, can't cooperate well with other colleagues and say inappropriate things like harsh comments in gathering. These all hinder your performance in career.

4. Fail to Cooperate in Teamwork

What is wrong with me? Why do the team members hate me? Low EQ! Teamwork means that you’ll be expected to collaborate and interact with others in positive ways in order to reach the team’s goals. Those with low EQ have trouble interacting and engaging with other people in ways that benefit the team, and this can lead to feelings of isolation and frustration.

5. Have No Empathy

Empathy means that you frequently act with indifference, or you’re not mindful of others’ feelings, like talking about your new boyfriend with a colleague who is going through breakup. Low EQ in this area could lead to morally bankrupt behaviour that nobody will respect, even if you are making fair and rational judgments.

6. Read Micro-Expressions Incorrectly

There are seven universal micro-expressions; anger, sadness, fear, disgust, contempt, surprise, and happiness. Knowing how to interpret and read micro-expressions are a critical part of reading people and understanding nonverbal behavior. A low EQ in this ability can limit a person’s social skills and the ability to connect with others.

7. Fear Adversity

Like it or not, adversity is part of everyone’s life, and overcoming adversity is what builds character and resilience. Many people have found ways to be courageous in the face of adversity. However, people with a low EQ either won’t face them, or they’ll delay facing them, because it is simply too overwhelming for them.

8. Arguments Lead to Resentment

What is wrong with me? I think everyone around is so hateful! Arguments can make people very uncomfortable. Most people know that the best way to resolve an argument is to negotiate with the other person. However, low EQ people may find a person upsets them so much that they lash out, and the unresolved argument leads to feelings of resentment and confusion.

There Are Other Explanations to Your Suffering

Besides low EQ, your bad feeling may have other causes and the answers to "what wrong with me" can really startle you.

Mostly There Is Nothing Wrong With You

The answer might come as a surprise, but it's true in most cases. When we feel bad, we have emotions like anxiety and fear. These emotions are very normal and important, but they can cause psychological and physical changes to us.

Going through a bad time and bad emotions like feeling insecure, worried, irritated and isolated may lead you to depression and retreating from the outside word. You feel that you just can't fit in the world around you and think there must be something wrong with you. Physically, your adrenaline will kick in, as well as other fight or flight responses, reacting to those bad feelings. You might have physical responses like an accelerated heartbeat, and tightness in your muscles on top of your emotional reactions. However, keep in mind that there is nothing wrong with you and it's just your emotions!

But Physical or Emotional Issues Are Possible

Sometimes there may be emotional or physical issues beyond one's control that lead to the question "What is wrong with me?" For example, Parkinson's disease can cause depression, fatigue, apathy, etc. Besides, depression, psychotic disorder, dissociative disorder, etc. are more than just going through a rough time or feeling sad. They are serious health conditions that require treatment, understanding, and a recovery plan.

Seek Medical Care

  • When you notice a mix of emotions that tend to accompany depression such as sadness, negativity, and low self-esteem.
  • When you're not getting the proper amount of sleep at night.
  • When you are in physical pain.
  • You are preoccupied with thoughts of sadness and emptiness that affects your job, memory, or decision-making skills.
  • When you don’t have the ability to derive pleasure from pleasant experiences.
  • You feel extreme guilt for things you aren't solely responsible for.
  • You have persistent thoughts about ending your life.
  • You have a constant feeling of panic and obsessive thoughts that cause symptoms, such as excessive perspiration, rapid heartbeat, and sleep problems.
  • You feel overwhelmed in daily life, and feeling exhausted.
  • When you have a chronic ailment that you can't attribute to another cause and it isn't clearing up on its own.
  • If any other issues are leaving you feeling chronically depressed.
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